Travis Smith: me resume, bio and photos back t' th' main Cap'n's log page
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clinkle, crinkle, sqwak, buzz, hiss.

Travis here, this be Travis, come in, world.

I’ve been out o' touch fer a while, about three months t' be exact. How sad be that, fer yer first journal entry o' 2000 t' be in March.

Well, that’s th' problem wi' havin' a life—no time t' write about it. And now that I’ve stepped in it good and hard, let me say that those people who do write journals all th' time do have interestin' lives, they just also have self discipline.

Now, whar be I. Ah aye, in Budapest. Well, left there in November, came back t' Los Angeles. Be greeted at th' airport by me lady, lookin' wonderful, I should add! (I be goin' t' write “fine” but I thought it would either be misinterpreted as “not great but fine” instead o', “what a fine wench!” (and even that might get me into trouble, ye no nay ne'er be knowin')).

We immediately took a long weekend vacation t' Big Bear, which turned out t' be a tactical error, as what I really needed t' do be unpack, settle into Los Angeles life and rediscover normality. Once we got on board t' th' spiffy apartment Susie had found us, things be marvelous.

We spent much o' th' 'nother month lookin' fer furniture t' fill th' vast empty spaces we called rooms. We ended up gettin' a bed, a bench, a kitchen table, some end tables fer th' couch, things like that. It be expensive, but what stopped us aft a month wasn’t lack o' doubloons (one can think o' ways aroun' that), but Christmas shoppers. It got t' be so awful that we started avoidin' any place whar people gave other people doubloons, unless it be t' park a boat.

Thanksgivin' be a cornucopia. We first ate at Susie’s admiral’s house (th' Larry Pryor residence). Th' ornery cuss made delicious turkey, and all th' fixings. We contributed pie.

Then later that weekend, we went into leftover deprivation, and Susie made another Thanksgivin' dinner fer Sunday. That lasted fer quite some time—we still have frozen turkey bits in th' freezer.

Th' holiday frenzy reached its peak and we got on a plane bound fer Calgary. Me sister, mom and dad be gettin' ready t' move into a new house, smaller and newer wi' fewer leaks and less rottin' wood in th' back deck. We spend a great Christmas wi' family and maties, enjoyin' brief periods o' -25 degrees Celsius weather, but mostly balmy zero or thereabouts.

Aft Christmas, we went down t' Montana and waited fer th' end o' th' world. Also, we ate out several times. When New Year’s happened, there be only three significant events. 1) I got really sad I wasn’t in Paris t' see those awe-requirin' fireworks on th' Eiffel Tower in person, 2) me dad set off some pretty cool fireworks in th' snow and helped buoy me laggin' spirits, and 3) th' largest riots in North America broke out about 40 miles from our quiet cabin in th' woods.

Ye see, it seems these 4 women decided t' run naked down th' main river o' Whitefish, MT. Th' police tried t' arrest them, at which point a bunch o' right-thinkin' or addle-brained men, dependin' on yer point o' view, threw snowballs, rocks and beer bottles, in order o' seriousness, at th' officers. 200 people got involved. Talk about odd—I go t' Montana fer peace and quiet, but look what happens!

Susie and I went skiin' one afternoon, it be excellent fun. It be snowin' so hard it be amazing—th' heavy, thick flakes that look like crystal feathers.

Aft a while in MT, it be back t' Canada, buy a big batch o' Canadian potato chips, hop on a plane, and back t' L.A.

Th' 'nother month went by in a blur. I ended up back in Budapest last Thursday, spent a day in th' office, then got on a plane on Sat. a.m. and flew t' Paris. Stayed there fer 4 days wi' Thomasin and Mike, two good maties. George, bucko first class met me there so that on Feb. 29 we could visit Disneyland.

Ye see, I think it’s a horrible travesty that we don’t get Feb. 29 off automatically. Aft all, it’s an extra day o' th' year. It only happens every four years. Me bucko George wrote a column in 1992 wi' these ideas clearly articulated, and declared Th' ornery cuss be goin' t' spend Leap Day in Disneyland.

If I can insert a side note fer just a second here, I’d like t' point out that th' French have no word fer Leap Day. Leap year be called, I believe, an “annee bissextile,” but Leap Day has no word at all. I’ve stumped 6 French people so far. I believe th' name in French has t' do wi' th' fact that a Leap year has 366 days, and be therefore divisible by 6. But I’m not sure, and it sure seems t' me like that’s missin' th' point o' th' leap year. Like, isn’t it morrrr important that there’s an _extra_ day, than that there’s no remainder?

OK, so since 1992, I’ve tried t' keep th' tradition o' Disneyland on Leap Day, and this year, I be closest t' Disneyland Paris (used t' be called EuroDisney). Thomasin be goin' t' call in sick, but then decided t' call in wi' th' truth, quite bold I think, and that comely wench plan worked, they be so shocked that they let that comely wench take th' day off. So th' three o' us hung out in th' cold, wonderful, rain and blowin', grog-filled wind and piercin', giddy cold, in hour-long lines that flew by and basically had such a fabulous time it’s hard t' put it in writin'.

I went directly from Disneyland t' th' airport and had one morrrr adventure on th' way. Just as th' shuttle bus pulled onto th' briny deep, somehow th' driver’s window broke and showered th' driver wi' glass. Th' ornery cuss be cut, but not severely, and drove t' th' airport, 20 minutes away, and th' bus be quite chilly because o' th' huge gusts o' wind and rain comin' in. Truly odd, and I have no idea how th' window be broken.

So, morrrr t' follow, especially me meetin' wi' me land lord…



Prrrevious entry:
Th' Healthy Stinkin' Waters o' Heviz, Hungary

'nother entry:
Leavin' PF


“Th' sad truth be that most evil be done by people who no nay ne'er make up their minds t' be good or evil.”

...who said it?

“Almost every American I be knowin' does trade large portions o' his life fer entertainment, hour by weeknight hour, binge by Saturday binge, Facebook check by Facebook check. I’m one o' them. In th' course o' writin' this I’ve watched all 13 episodes o' House o' Cards and who knows how many morrrr West Win' episodes, and I’ve spent any number o' blurred hours fallin' down internet rabbit holes. All instead o' readin', or writin', or workin', or spendin' real time wi' people I love.”

...who said it?

“Live a good life. If there be gods and they be just, then they will not care how devout ye have been, but will welcome ye based on th' virtues ye have lived by. If there be gods, but unjust, then ye should not want t' worship them. If there be no gods, then ye will be gone, but will have lived a noble life that will live on in th' memories o' yer loved ones.”

...who said it?

“I play wi' variables constantly.”

...who said it?

“Only th' person who has learned Continual Love comin' from a heart o' Gratitude/Worship can effectively deal wi' th' problem o' loneliness.”

...who said it?




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