Knock Knock
posted at 12:01 pm
on Oct. 15, 2001
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Sometimes I cry a little.
Sometimes I feel empty, like a paper bag with nothing in it. I rustle a bit, but I’m made of sturdy stuff, so I don’t deflate, fall over, lie flat.
Sometimes I push it all out of my mind for a while. But if I talk to someone, anyone, for too long on any unrelated subject, it inevitably comes up again.
Mostly I just read news sites and try to figure out what happened yesterday, now that I have had some time to digest it. Of course, I keep getting distracted by today’s update—CNN sent out at least two breaking news announcements today and a few yesterday. But I can stop and think reasonably about this all tomorrow, when things get a little calmer.
* * *
It’s not that I’m personally worried about the possibility of another attack. OK, that’s part of it, but not a big part. I mean, I live in L.A., but not at Disneyland or a military base. (Funny, those in the same sentence.)
But I do work at Variety, and Susie works at U.S.C., and those aren’t non-entities—they’re probably slightly higher on the list than Krispy Kreme, lower than Universal Studios.
Mostly, I think, I’m upset by the fact that I have a list in my head that has a big headline, underlined, that reads “If I Was a Terrorist, I Would Attack…” and then has about a zillion targets.
If I Was a Terrorist I Would Attack…
- things that are very tall and important
- things that are very old and historic
- things that are popular and fun and full of people
- cute kittens
- the American way of life
- the mall—we hate Banana Republic
- the heart of the transportation industry—the DMV
- schools
- hospitals
- churches
- parks
- museums
- libraries
- banks
- delis
- gas stations
- office supply stores
- Nike (Just Do It)
- the man
- the airwaves
That last one’s kind of interesting, and it’s what someone has basically done. I’m not saying that anthrax isn’t horrible and scary and a risk. But is it really the worst risk to American lives right now? No, it’s a diversion. But because it’s happening to JOURNALISTS—to the very people who decide what stories are important, we’re blowing the stories out of proportion to their magnitude.
* * *
But enough. As I said earlier, a lot of conversations seem to turn to this lately. I guess that’s what happens during a war—I never really knew that before. Live and learn. Live and learn.
* * *
On the car ride home yesterday, I saw a man standing in the street with a white sign. He’d scrawled a message on it, in marker. It said www.sparechange.com.
* * *
I went to The Pig restaurant recently with Tuzy and Calvin. The Pig is a barbecue place in L.A. that has above average barbecue at a decent price. It’s on La Brea, but for me, if I’m that close to Pink’s, why am I wasting my time at The Pig?
* * *
People keep calling my cell phone to buy my Dad’s car. He was in L.A. while I was in South Africa. He fed our cat, and watered our plant. When we came back, there were flowers in places I didn’t even know could flower.
Anyway, he listed the car in the Recycler, http://www.recycler.com, and now these people call for it, but he went hoe because while he was here, not a single person called. Odd.
* * *
There are flying creatures eating a table outside my door. I bought some termite and other creature killer and sprayed it on the table. We’ll see how it goes—though i don’t exactly think these are termites; but what do I know? If you have advice, please let me know.
